why couldn’t i be born with an older brother who is my best friend and has hot friends that flirt with me and drives me places like mcdonalds when im sad and punches rude boys in the face for me.
My brother once sat on me and farted until I passed out
my brother duct taped me to a treadmill and turned it to the highest setting once
when I was four my brother locked me in a ferret cage for an hour on Christmas Eve
I CANt STOP LAUGHING AT CLINTS FACE IN THE NEW POSTER HE IS 300% DONE WITH THESE ROBOTS
tony why did you build the homicidal robot?
i wonder if magic is real, but only in a really mundane way.
when i was little i could almost inerringly switch back to disney channel right as the ads ended when i was channel surfing.
maybe youve never accidentally crushed a ladybug underfoot. maybe your microwave popcorn never burns. maybe you can spin around lots and lots of times before you get dizzy.
is that magic??
honestly im not sure if these are magic or just small, invisible skills. im not sure which i like better.
And here we can see the Blogger in her natural habitat.
The blogger is a shy, docile creature…
… that prefers the darkness…
… and tends to be wary of the outside world.
The Blogger rarely sleeps, and when it does, it does so in seemingly random places.
We have attempted to understand the dietary habits of the Blogger…
… but to no avail.
I am so glad this is back